Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Don't Stay at Home!

Go where today?
My first few months in the house with the kids was the winter of 2010. I was depressed and lazy, content with turning on the electronic babysitters: Nick, Jr. and the History Channel. (They're big fans of Modern Marvels and I am quite partial to Maggie and the Ferocious Beast). It was cold and snowy out and the last thing I wanted to do was to get out of the house. There are many emotional reasons for this on my part, but really I was just so lazy and unhappy with my situation. I resented my new situation and I also didn't want to be bothered with snow pants and boots, gloves and hats - yuk! Not to mention, there is not one pair of gloves or mittens in existence that is waterproof and will fit a 3 year old. (If there is please let me know where). Besides being completely selfish, this is not a healthy existence for kids. Children need an outlet to release energy and to exercise their imaginations. Needless to say, I rarely got out of the house and the excuses ranged from the bad weather to the intense priority of my "special projects".

Guys tend to move from one project to another, sometimes operating within multiple projects making the completing of said projects not quite as important as the act of being involved in one. This being the case I managed to develop many different time consumers that confined me to the basement or my computer (a blog does not count as one of these projects). The kids were bored out of their skulls, so I tried different games and adventured around the house. One of their favorites was an Indiana Jones game I created which involved creating treasure maps and hiding an artifact somewhere in the yard. This went over well, however was quite an undertaking and I ran out of places to bury my wife's jewelery box (sorry dear). Finally I woke up and realized the magic of venturing off-campus. Here is a short list of things I decided are the key to a successful day - I am sure there are more to include, but these were the most common for me:


  • Bring food and drinks. Enough for about 3 small meals in total per kid. (Mixture of healthy and treats) The travel and excitement seems to super-charge the appetites of your adventurers.
  • A change of clothes per child. (A lot of these playgrounds have sand boxes or are built on sand)
  • Sunscreen/hats - a no brainer but easy to forget.
  • First aid kit. 9 times out of 10 you use the band-aids for small cuts and scrapes that don't even bleed, but somehow the presence of a band-aid stops the pain.
  • Baksheesh/bribe (usually in the form of a treat) This enables you to enforce the decisions you make by offering up this gift in exchange for amicable cooperation.
  • Book, magazine for you. You won't get a chance to read it, but the day you don't bring it they'll leave you alone with your thoughts.


Playground
I started driving the kids to the local playground down the street which culminated to a 45 minute drive (one way) to the mac-daddy of all playgrounds in Parma,NY. Sometimes you can befriend a local mom and she will clue you into the really sheik places to go. ****BEWARE OF THE MOM-CULT**** Stay at home dads beware!


Water
You cannot go wrong bringing the kids to a canal, stream, lake, river or if you are lucky enough to have one nearby - the ocean. Go fishing or rent paddle boats/canoes. Go for a walk on a canal trail or around a lake. It seems obvious, but sometimes the simple things become elusive. Sometimes a water park can be just what the  daddy needs.

Learning Facilities
This one is often overlooked. Dads usually think of the fun and sporty/outdoorsy types of things, but overlook the 'geeky' ones. Find a local museum, many of which have something for kids of all ages. Believe it or not, kids love to learn. Even if getting them off to school seems like coaxing a mule to plow, kids will be excited to have a day at a museum or planetarium. Most major cities and smaller metro-areas have something decent. They are not all the Metropolitan Museum, but so many have much to offer and are usually run by enthusiastic people who started their careers off in education. The public library is also a great place.

Malls/Stores
This can be a slippery slope and ground rules must be established first. Claim that you are going on a scavenger hunt or maybe give them the directive of finding a perfect gift for mom. Make it clear, however, that you will not be buying them anything or it will be like Pavlov's Dog. Many malls have some kind of kid-friendly activity or attraction. The mall nearest my home has a carousel. You can end the trip with some frozen yogurt.

Farms/Zoo
Everyone knows that kids love animals. Take them off the beaten path to see some horses or cows. Even something as simple as pulling off the road with a snack and talk about the cows in the field. Give the animals names and make up stories about them. The kids will have a great time, and you will too.




If you are reading this as asking yourself,  "Who does this guy think he is? I am not an idiot!" You're right, you are not an idiot, and neither was I when I first became a stay at home dad. Deep down I already knew these things and where to take the kids. For whatever reasons, I didn't do it. Everyone's situation is different and maybe you have everything you need and know everything you should know. I sure didn't, and so if anyone reads this and it helps, then I have done something right.

Take care dads.

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